Creating shadows is a natural part of learning to belong to any culture but creating shadows also creates shame. It’s pretty simple. Suppressing certain aspects of us also creates shame about those aspects. Our shadow self is made up of all these suppressed aspects. We access our unconscious, where our shadow lives, through the images and feelings in day and night dreams, imagination and yes, our sexual fantasies.
Sissy Sluts as an Example of Erotic Shadow is men into cross dressing are into it for a huge variety of reasons and not all of them have a core erotic theme __based in humiliation. Like wise, not every one who has humiliation as a core __erotic theme __is into __cross dressing. I am just using cross dressing__as a possible expression of someone who has humiliation as a core __erotic theme in the example below.
person born in a male body is socialised to act like a man and man up from the moment he is first put in his pale blue all in one as a baby. Depending on the particular culture, subculture and family beliefs, the idea of how to act like a man will have various expressions. Some common themes are not being allowed to wear pink, satin, frills, flowers, make up, or anything associated with being a girl. Crying, showing emotion, forming intimate connections with mates where feelings are openly shared skipping moving the pelvis in a feminine way etc Along for the ride with this mentality is the idea that men are the doers in sex and women are the done to.
_Sex__ inherently taints women but not men. Being receptive is female Being __penetrated __is not a manly thing to do. These attributes and acts literally have to be trained out of our boys to turn them into men. That means the attributes were there to start with but had to be suppressed.
any aspects of masculinity have to be performed and reinforced and are often reinforced quite brutally. I’m not saying there aren’t natural differences between people born with penises and those born with pussies, but I am saying there are clearly also some pretty strong socialisation processes. Boys frequently bully each other the second they show any sign of being girly. Being like a girl is the worst crime and is considered weak, submissive and pathetic. It may even earn you a beating and being socially ostracised. There is deep shame in showing any attributes considered feminine. Having a big cock is the ultimate symbol of being a sexually virile manly man and is associated with dominance. ￼ s a dominatrix, I see a lot of men who are incredibly turned on by being forced to wear girly, frilly panties. They feel really turned on by being forced to do all those things normally considered sissy but have no idea why. It is such a common pattern there is a common name for it. It’s called a sissy slut session. The sissy sluts who also have humiliation as part of their turn on want to feel all the girly things forbidden to them and be humiliated for it. They want to feel sexually desired and objectified the way women often are. They love the feel of the silky under things against their skin but for the humiliation themed sissies, it isn’t truly hot until they are mocked and degraded for it.
hey want to not only be smeared in lipstick and made to take on the body language of girls but they want to be degraded and called a slut for it forced to suck my strap on and then be used anally. Some find having their cock mocked as small and useless is a real turn on. Basically, living out their worst fears and transforming them into something pleasurable through eroticising them.
his is just a small sample of many possible forms humiliation sessions might take. Anyone of any gender can enjoy humiliation play on either the giving or the receiving end. Another example could be treated like an animal, caged and collared… because likewise the aspects of us that are considered uncultured, raw and sexual are often correlated with acting like an animal.
nother person may enjoy eroticising the feeling of being seen and used as just a sex object. Some may secretly fantasise about being a trussed up like a naked, hog tied, turkey in the middle of the boardroom table while surrounded with corporate types in suits observing and analysing them. Others enjoy the thought of being de humanised altogether and treated like a resource. A thing. Or actively scolded and dressed down.It’s not always overtly erotic either.
_Humiliation__ is complex. I won’t go into all the possible nuances here. Some of us have it as a deeply rooted core erotic theme that will remain with us for the rest of their lives. Others of us have other core erotic themes but have aspects of feeling shame and embarrassment threading through our secret masturbation fantasies like a spice that adds the kick. It’s not surprising really given the mixed messages we are given about our sexuality from the get go. It’s a source of wonder and great shame. The sex Goddess is also the slut and the whore.
ex is as important as eating or drinking and we ought to allow the one appetite to be satisfied with as little restraint or false modesty as the other. Marquis de Sade
Mistress Kristina - Huddersfield Mistress